No matter how early I wake up.
No matter how long I sit in front of that computer.
If I don’t write the words, if I keep looking at the pandemic news about… the pandemic, not only I will not reach my writing goals, but I’ll keep waking up at 3 am for no good reasons.
And the only good reason to wake up at 3 am is either to go to work, or to get to work on a project close to our hearts.
The need to write
But this kind of having a hard time being productive, you know, even if I get up early, even if I’m motivated and I genuinely need/want to write happens almost every single time something change in my daily routine.
For I need to write, more than ever. And according to my email accounts, I’m really not the only one in this very situation.
Everything changed, one day after the other. After those fourteen days, we’ll all be in a new era.
A better one, where more people take care of their garden instead of thinking of getting rich on the back of the poorest?
I highly doubt that.
Somehow, I think that is what’s making me sad.
The intimate conviction that humans will do everything to get their money back, despite the climate change crisis, despite the need for a change in our consumption habits.
Being a stay-at-home-parent is exhausting
Going from working-at-home-mom to stay-at-home-and-protect-your-kid-from-a-virus-mom in a blink of an eye is a big, big change.
The growing anxiety I feel, not only about the virus but, also, about the well-being and the education of my child, is slowing my writing productivity. Of course it would. But somehow, I’m still disappointed in me. Why can’t I get passed adaptation faster, as in now? Simply sit and write when I can, instead of watching the news and day-nightmaring about tomorrow.
I sleep less. Like every parent taking care of the kids at home now, I go busy-busy-bee all day, activities, cooking, cleaning, more activities. When the evening writing session strikes, I’m exhausted. No surprise there.
Beyond the exhaustion, the stories await
Is it Agatha Christie who said her best time to brainstorm story ideas was while doing the dishes?
Well, let me tell you, when a kiddo is tugging my leg, begging for a piece of cheese twenty minutes before lunch while both my hands are soaking in greasy soapy hot water, I ain’t able to brainstorm s**t.
At this point, I’m relying almost entirely on the online writing community to give me the much needed kick in the butt I need to suck-it-up and WRITE.
Many, many authors have way more stressful day jobs than I do, plus kids, plus several birthdays-holidays obligations… well, we used to anyway.
I am Very lucky. And I should take full advantage of it.
Stop complaining, lucky lady. Bonus, stop watching the news so darn much.
Stay home, stay safe fellow writers! Thanks so, so much for reading.